Vampires Don't Sparkle!
by Cosmic Creativity
Summary: "You jerk! You know that crap doesn't wash out!" ... In which Roy helps Ed with his Halloween Costume... One-shot!


_**Happy Halloween everyone! :D Of course, since it's the best day of the year, I had to write a special fic. I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it.**_

 _ **For anyone who cares, I used to be The SoulEater Alchemist, but I changed my name. I still have my other stories if you want to go ashead and read them, and tell me what you think.**_

 _ **Important Note! : For anyone who has been reading Breathe, it is on temporary hiatus! I am so sorry to anyone who has been enjoying that thing I call a story. It should be only a short break, at least until I can get it back on track. It's really kicking my butt. Any suggestions are welcomed!**_

 _ **Disclaimer: I do not own FMA, nor do I own any of the characters. It is a tragedy. T^T All rights go to their respective owners.**_

"...Edward? What the hell are you doing?" Ed growled under his breath in frustration as he tried to sink deeper into the comforting shadows that had been meant to hide him. He held his breath, not daring to move, hoping that if he stayed still long enough, they'd forget he was even there. There was a sigh.

"Ed, I know you're there." Ed cursed silently before leaping out from the shadows, landing in a crouch in front of the wooden desk. He stood up rigidly, scowling. Roy sighed again in exasperation as his eyes raked over his subordinate's... interesting choice of clothing, for lack of a better word.

"I'll ask again, what were you doing? And what is it that you are wearing?..." By now, Roy felt like he should be used to the boy's strange taste in clothes. He was used to Ed's eccentric flare, but this?... This was on a whole different level.

The boy stood straight-backed, clad in a white button down shirt. The ends of the sleeves were ruffled, and Roy wasn't sure whether he should cringe or laugh. His trade mark red coat was missing. Instead, in it's place, thrown over the collared shirt, was a black, satin cape of some sort. The inside of it, he could see, was a deep crimson color. The odd piece of clothing had a stiff collar, rising up behind the boy's head. A golden charm hung from a tarnished chain around his neck. He wore his usual leather pants. Roy rolled his eyes. He shouldn't have expected _those_ to go anytime soon anyway. And _of course_ , on his feet, he still had on his black platform boots. Because, god forbid, anything that adds to the boy's height be taken away. His golden hair was undone from it's braid, and instead hung in a single ponytail, laying in waves against his shoulder. Roy crossed his arms and frowned.

"Well, Fullmetal? Are you going to answer me?" Ed glared at him murderously.

"Happy Halloween, bastard," he said simply. Roy raised an eyebrow.

"What?" Ed scowled.

"Check your calander moron. It's October 31st," he snapped. Roy smirked, as in that moment, he was once again reminded of how much of a child Ed still was, even if he joined the military at 13. He may have seen his fair share of hell, but he was still a child. The attire he stood in now was more than enough proof of that.

"So you're a vampire then?" Ed rolled his eyes and nodded, as if it weren't totally obvious.

"Yeah I am. Now, if you'll excuse me," he said as he turned to leave. He had been hoping to come here and scare Mustang, but clearly that hadn't happen, so he figured there was no point of staying. Maybe he could go scare Al. A wicked grin spread across his face at the thought.

"Wait just a moment, Fullmetal." He whirled around to glare at the smirking Mustang.

"I'm off duty. So what the hell do you want?" His retort only seemed to further Roy's amusement. The man stood up from his chair and walked over to him, looking down on the boy.

"You're missing a vital part of your costume, Ed. Allow me to help you," he said, his tone mocking. Ed gulped as he turned once more to run away from whatever impending doom awaited him, but... he was too late. Before he knew what was happening, he was seeing nothing but sparkling silver. He cried out in shock as he stumbled back frantically, falling over and landing right on his behind. He blinked a few times in dumbfounded confusion before looking down at his costume. His eyes widened in horror. He bowed his head, letting his bangs shadow his face.

"You bastard..." he growled softly. Roy chuckled.

"Now, now. I was only helping. There's no reason to get upset." Ed's head whipped up as he glared at the man, his golden eyes flaming with unsuppressed rage.

"Helping? You know this crap doesn't come out!" He shouted furiously as he scrambled to his feet, his steady gaze promising a very painful death.

"I thought you were supposed to be a vampire though," Roy replied a little too innocently.

"Y-You... VAMPIRES DON'T SPARKLE YOU BASTARD!" He shouted at the top of his lungs, his face a brilliant shade of angry red. Roy only laughed.

"Sure they do, _Edward_ ," he insisted, not the least bit afraid of the tiny blond. Ed shouted a few more choice words before storming off. Roy watched in amusement as fellow officers cleared the way, not wanting to be the recieving end of the alchemist's wrath. He didn't blame them. As the doors to his office slammed shut, he chuckled, thinking he had heard Ed muttering.

"That sparkly fairy ruined my name." He laughed, before walking back to his desk to return to the work he had been working on. The now empty clear tube lay forgotten on the floor, a few sparkles still coating it's edges.

 _ **Why would Mustang carry around a tube of glitter?...**_


End file.
